Professor Mom

Chronicles the life of a mom, teacher, and writer trying to stay sane amid the chaos of daily life.

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JohnROSS's picture JohnROSS

Oh my, out of the mouths of nine year olds, aye? Bless your heart.

I frustrated both my mother and my 1st wife for years with the fact that one day I would like a certain food and two days later didn't. Not a bit.(though I pretty much ALWAYS hate cilantro & onions) I try to make it easier these days, cause I'm not cooking.

Yes, you're right. what works once, contrary to what biz whiz-es and motivational speakers will tell you, won't necessarily work twice.

I debated for two years in high school. I think it takes a certain kind of mind set to even tolerate debate. A good exercise in strategic thinking, to be sure, bot not one that everyone can be comfortable with.

Thanks for another fine post(as always).


Aliki McElreath's picture Aliki McElreath

You hate cilantro and onions? How can that be? :)

Debate is a tricky thing indeed. My students are always so excited to do the unit, but then they struggle to comprehend what *debate* really means--i.e., not an argument about what music is better!


Omaha Mama's picture Omaha Mama

I hope it won't upset you to know that your last line made me laugh. Seems like you were going for some dark comedy there. :-) My little guy is stubborn in so many ways, we have to motivate him to achieve expected behavior too. He recently earned another reward (his third this school year) the plan is always that if he earns negative consequences at school, his reward will go up on the shelf and he'll have to earn it back through meeting expectations (and yes, there is ALWAYS a CHART!). The problem with this has been that by the time we fall off the behavior wagon, the charm of that reward (i.e. TOY) has worn off and we have to offer a new reward in hopes of motivation. This has meant three new toys since September. Not ideal, but boy do we want him to behave at preschool.


Omaha Mama's picture Omaha Mama

(I was too wordy today...here's the rest of my comment!)

My hope/goal is always that in the process of earning the reinforcer, the good behavior will become innate and he won't need the external reward. So far that hasn't exactly happened! We just have to keep trying to stay one step ahead of them, don't we?!


funnymummy's picture funnymummy

Hi

I am such a fan of your blog (all the way across the pond). I have always read it but i only just decided to sign up to family education so that i could leave you a comment (i finally have something worthwhile to say)

my kids love stories and wanting them to be the best they can be i went out insearch of a website or some kind of resource that would help me get them the best help out there. I think i have found it... well at least it works for me and my kids.

i just thought i would contribute to the community by telling you so if you go on there and agree with me, you could spread the word and let the help offered get to other mums.

it is writegalaxy.co.uk

keep up the good work...

best wishes

its funny to be a mummy :)


mouse's picture mouse

L. might benefit from a token economy for shorter term goals. This is something I've seen suggested by a few different Asperger's experts. If L. has a list of things he's expected to do, he can get tokens for each item checked off. Then each token could translate to something like a certain amount of computer time or watching a show he likes. If we did this with E., we would never tie it to something like Lego building, since he needs that to be centered, but video games and computer time would be fair game.

Right now, we've got a semi-successful sticker chart for E., but he too has trouble thinking about earning stickers when he doesn't have a specific goal or if he isn't interested in our offerings.


Aliki McElreath's picture Aliki McElreath

Those charts, Omaha--will we ever escape them? We have the same end goal as you do--hoping that the charts and reward systems will eventually give way to innate motivation!

Funnymummy--I am so glad you commented! It's wonderful to hear from readers. I will check out the story site you mentioned--I did click on over there and looks wonderful! I'll snoop around in a more in-depth way in the next day or two.

Mouse--we have tried token rewards (we have a glass bead jar for those) but it just doesn't seem to work well for L. Maybe we need to tweak that system as well.