Three years and counting

K-Man celebrated his third birthday yesterday, and the soiree is tomorrow. Three. Years. Old. Unbelievable. I don’t have that “I can’t believe it’s been three years already” feeling. Instead, it’s just more of a “I can’t believe how developed, aware and capable a three-year-old can be” feeling. What this kid is capable of – what he says and what he understands – continues to baffle me each and every day. Truly.

I went into the whole parenting thing blind. And, frankly, went into it completely unsure of what it was or what it meant. I didn’t really know anything about kids (still don’t?). I didn’t really notice kids. I noticed dogs. But not kids. If you pointed out a kid and asked me to guess his/her age, I wouldn’t have a clue. I can guarantee, however, that I would have guessed a three-year-old to be closer to five or even six.

If I look back at K-Man's development in the last few years, it’s incredible. From the first smile and laugh (that wasn’t because of gas) to rolling, crawling (never on his knees) and walking and running, it’s amazing to see what they learn and how they learn. Not just K-Man, but all kids, I suppose. (Yes, because he’s “my kid,” I likely feel he’s more incredible than most!)

While I certainly feel that it’s all moving so fast, at the same time I find myself thinking about what’s to come. I don’t want the time to move any faster than it is (though, sometimes, I guess I really do), but I can visualize the first day of school (“real school” with homework), his first Little League hit or first concert. I don’t want the time to move faster, but I look forward to so many of these life moments with/for the kid. This is only natural, I suppose.

I’m notorious for getting overly introspective on my own birthdays. Now that K-Man is having his “big days,” I’m doing the same with him. The difference is that I think about my own place in the world for my birthdays: Am I achieving all that I want to achieve and chasing the dreams that need to be chased? But, for K-Man’s birthday, I ponder whether I’m being the best dad I can be: Am I teaching him all that I need to teach him, and helping him explore all that needs to be explored? I hope so.

Parenting, of course, is strange that way – equal parts reward and patience-drain. (Maybe not “equal,” but you get the idea.) So, I think I’m far more aware of when I’m being a “bad dad” than when I’m actually providing the right example. Maybe that’s part of being overly hard on oneself. And, K is still a little young for me to torment him with, “So, little man, have I done right by you?” Then again, it wouldn’t surprise me if he responded with, “Well, Dad, I would actually prefer if you…” and then rattled of a list of one or two (or 10 or 100) things that he wished I would do.

But, this is his day. And, at three years old, he doesn’t have the time or the need to reflect and get introspective. That’s the genius of being three, I suppose. It’s just learning, growing, playing and playing some more. (And, eating, sleeping and potty training – more on that later.) That’s the genius of being three – every day is still a new adventure, and K-Man seems to squeeze every single drop that he can out of his life. I love that about him.

Perhaps that’s it. I need to stop worrying about what I can teach him and really pay more attention to what he can teach me. Wow. I can’t believe he’s three years old already.


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