FamilyEducation Blogs


October 2008 Archive

October 28, 2008

My mother

My mother is avoiding me. I saw her this afternoon. She waited for me in front of the Boston Medical Center’s entrance, wearing a black leather jacket, talking with two women who obviously abuse a substance. She appeared to ask the women to walk with her to my car, but the women shook their heads “no.” My mother avoided eye contact with me. She walked straight to the back window, to my son. Danny said, “Hi, little nana.” Her face said, “I’m tired, worn down, and beat up.” Her eyes were sleepless and her skin dead.
October 27, 2008

My daughter

I remember that when my daughter was maybe 10 or 11, she was awestruck with the notion of ironing her own clothes. I allowed her to iron one day, and somehow she burned her face. A blister quickly formed underneath her eye. Now that I write this, I am thinking maybe I should say she was 13, because allowing a 10- or 11-year-old to iron seems irresponsible. [more]

October 21, 2008

People of integrity

What makes you a person of integrity? Do you have to be a person who is honest and truthful? The nearer I am to a person, the more that person’s integrity is revealed. Are you a person of integrity when you promise a child you'll buy them a candy bar and you don’t? Are you a person of integrity when you take a sick day from work and you’re not sick?

Or does it have to be severe to compromise one’s integrity? Do I have to commit a great sin, like being sexually intimate with a man who isn’t my husband? [more]

October 20, 2008

A mother's pain

“It doesn’t end on the street,” she said. Her 13-year-old son was shot in the head on October 4, 2007 by a gunman police believe was targeting someone else. His mother, Karen Old, sat across from me at a conference table. She wore a beautiful gold necklace and matching earrings and a pin with a picture of him on her chest; right by her heart. I saw the strength in her eyes and heard her heart beating through her words. “It doesn’t end on the street. I need to know,” she said. [more]

October 19, 2008

Living off daddy

It was my cousin Dee-Dee who told my grandmother that I was pregnant. I couldn’t tell her myself. I remember my grandmother coming to the door of my bedroom that I shared with my cousin and two sisters and any other family member who needed a place to sleep. She looked at me – her eyes piercing though me – she said nothing, turned around and walked away. [more]

October 18, 2008

Broken in little pieces

I sat in the bathtub after a long Saturday of cleaning. Lying exposed in the mildly hot water felt as if I was thawing. I stared at the silvery faucet and shower head, and the tiles. A thought came to mind, “You should slide under the water.” I indulged the thought for a moment. What would it feel like if I allowed my head to go under water? I denied the suicidal contemplation. My husband told me not to write about this, but I thought, “Why not?” There are many people who have thought about taking their own life. [more]

October 17, 2008

I feel alone

I feel alone. I am trying to do everything, and people still expect more from me. I’d like to run away to a secluded island for rest, peace, and quiet. I would love to be in a place were you can smell the morning and hear nothing but the birds; a place somewhere that’s nowhere, so I can clear my thoughts and regroup. But if I did, then who would answer Jeremiah’s letter, encouraging him to think of a possible 15-year sentence as just a stop on his journey? If I did, then who would talk with the boys and encourage their little triumphs? [more]

October 16, 2008

I'm tired

I know why people abuse drugs: to alleviate the pressure of mental throbbing. My head is hurting and tears run down my face. I am tired. Have you ever felt like breaking down? That is how I am feeling. It all started because of a damaged file. [more]

October 15, 2008

My son

In the late afternoon my son and I were walking into our lobby, and there was a voter’s registration table with red, white, and blue balloons floating above the table. What got Baby Danny’s attention was the bowl of lollipops. “What is this table for?” he asked. “To vote,” I said. “Vote for what?” he asked. “The president,” I said. “Oh, you mean I can vote for Barack Obama,” he said with enthusiasm. I was soon in the elevator and Baby Danny entered with an elderly white woman. Her hair was cut short, and her glasses sat on the tip of her nose, like a schoolteacher's. [more]

October 14, 2008

Army wives

It is hard to believe that there are some children whose life dream is to serve our country. The little boy who admires the army uniform and raises his left hand to his head in salute to the flag of the United States of America. Boys and girls who mature into men and women, then risk their lives to protect ours. Every day a solider dies; every day a solider sacrifices. I love America, born in the USA, the home of the free and the land of the brave. [more]

123next ›last »